A Mental and Physical Change

EmilyBlog, Fat to Fit } My Journey, Transformations3 Comments


Many people have asked me about how I lost all my weight.  I would like to share the down to earth and real ways I achieved my weight loss. I would also like to reinforce it with the “why”.  I credit my success to the fact that I don’t believe in diets, you have to make a lifestyle change.

I began my weight loss journey 5 years ago, after I my first daughter was born. I had spent years hiding behind my weight, as a defense mechanism(The category strength from pain will offer more insight into this).   Adding to that, was the fact that  my only source of pleasure, joy or comfort came from food.   I found myself at a whopping 265 lbs on my 5’9 frame.

The birth of my daughter changed everything for me! I now had the most amazingly beautiful, perfect and overwhelming source of joy and pride.  I wanted to be able to do everything with and for her. I knew I wanted her to grow up with a healthy body image and that I couldn’t teach her this, if I was always hiding in clothes and afraid to wear a swim suit in public.   I wanted my full attention on her and creating a life rich in learning and memories.  Not how my thighs looked in a swim suit or what jiggled, when I danced and played with her.

This began the first stage of my transformation.  I joined weight watchers and began learning more about healthy living and food.  I gave up on sweets and after losing the first 60 lbs,  I started doing yoga and pillaties. There were plenty of plateaus and it took me almost two years. I knew I couldn’t beat my self up or push to hard or I would give up.  So every pound down was a reason to celebrate. Before I knew it, I had lost 90 lbs! I was more than confidant in my skin and full of energy to play and explore in the world with my daughter.  Then I hit a major speed bump, that was more than a little defeating. During my second pregnancy I gained 85 lbs!

I am telling you, pregnancy for me, is like pulling the rip cord

on and inflatable life raft.

I had little to no impulse control and gave into every craving in the most fantastical form of overindulgence. To make it worse, I had pregnancy complications that caused me to have false contractions, be light-headed/black out with any form of rapid movement or exertion. With no exercise and a Dr order to limit my standing and walking at work… which eventually lead to bed rest the last month… I was beyond depressed and discouraged.

After giving birth to my second daughter, I knew I could not indulge in these worthless feelings.  I had to make up my mind and get back to the healthy life I had achieved once before. When we packed up and drove across country for my husbands new job, when my youngest was four weeks old.  I was so worried about establishing a new community and friend base. My new weight had me insecure and uninterested in all the social events that arise with a move to a new community and your spouse starts a new job.

I still remember the look on my husbands face when I declared that I would be back in my old jeans within the year!  The pity and empathy in his eyes, as he tried to point  as delicately as possible, that it was a lot of weight and would take time.  He encouraged me to not be to hard on myself.  I knew I could not let my daughters watch me avoid social situations due to my weight. Once I found out what Virginia summer humidity was like… in maternity pants and full length sleeves no less, I had added motivation to reach my goals.

So… forward I went with round two, to reach and maintain, my Healthy weight goals.

On my fridge and pantry, I pasted a picture of myself from the day I met my goal the first time and a note that read,


Pre Baby Pic


” do not give up what you want most

for what you want right now”.

This help me to refocus, when I found my self reaching for something to eat. I would see that picture and remember how good it felt to be comfortable in my skin. This helped me make healthier choices or identify, if I was really hungry or just board.


I started rationalizing my intake on the basis of, “if I wouldn’t feed it to my girls then I shouldn’t feed it to my self.”  I am very nutritionally focused, when it comes to feeding my girls, to support their developmental needs.   A few months and 20 lbs down, from simply better food choices.

I found the MyfitnessPal app and started  tracking my intake. I stayed within a calorie goal the App helped me to set, based on the fitness goal.  Within a few months, I reached my goal!

In fact, it only took me 10 months to get back to my pre 2nd baby weight of 170 lbs.  I was elated to pull out the old wardrobe,  I loved so much, and zip up my jeans without any jumping, wiggling or sucking in. =)

At this weight,  I had met my goal and realized that I could do anything I set my mind to.

So,  I set a new goal, to reach the weight I was the most confident at 155. In this process I quickly learned I could no longer focus on simply caloric restriction to drop weight. I needed to learn how to excursus effectively to strengthen my body and replace fat with muscle.  I started doing 2-3 spin classes a week and added 2 strength training sessions to work on the tone and muscle I wanted to build.  Two months and 15 lbs later I pulled on a size 9 Jean… a size I hadn’t worn since high school! I had reached my goal!!

The best part,  is that I spent every day that summer soaking up memories with my two amazing girls by the pool.  Not distracted once, by what my thighs looked like in my TWO piece bathing suit,  the first one I have ever owned.

In future post I will share information on nutritional, calorie goals, tips and tricks for moms with little ones, fitting in fast effective workouts in a busy life and the rest of my journey from skinny fat to firm and fit.

Please feel free to leave your questions/ comments here and I will do my best to discuss them In my posts. I know how daunting weight loss can seem, in a chaotic busy life. Nothing is off limit, ask away, I would love to help you find take the mystery out of reaching your goals.

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3 Comments on “A Mental and Physical Change”

  1. Wow! I loved reading your story! I’m currently 23 weeks pregnant with my 4th and unfortunately having complications. I’ve been on bed rest at home for most of this pregnancy but things continued to worsen so I was admitted to the hospital 4 days ago for “strict” bed rest. I’m worried about the weight I will gain due to being unable to move around. I was wondering if you breast fed and if you watched what you were eating and how much you were taking in while breast feeding? How long did you breast feed? Were you working or a stay home mom? I’m a full time nurse and work X3 12 hr shifts and not sure how I’ll be able to juggle everything 🙁 really needing some encouragement! Thanks again for your post!

    1. Juliet,
      I am so sorry to hear you are going through this. I understand how hard it … and I promise you it will pass! And you will be better then you ever were before!
      to answer your questions:
      did I watch what I ate during pregnancy…. Not so much;( I gave into my depression about bed rest and overindulged. do I regret it…. of course, but you do what you can ands saying happy and healthy right now it the most important thing. So, do your best to make smart choices and don’t beat yourself up if you indulge from time to time! Mommas have to take care of themselves too.. sometimes this means giving into a craving. But, try a couple bites and drinking as much water in-between each bite. This will help you savor the sweet treat you needed in the moment, get the water you need for you and baby… and fill you up faster to avoid eating all of it.

      Did I breast feed and watch what I ate during that time? YES=)
      I was able to breast feed both my girls (different amounts of time for each one). Both of my girls were very sensitive to what I ate during breast feeding (what you eat they eat!).
      As far as calorie restrictions during breast feeding, this was not an option for me, the minute I tried to go anywhere below a 2000 cal diet my milk supply dropped. So, I made every calorie count with lots of protein, nutrient dense foods (let me know if you need more information on this) and feed my sweet tooth with fruits. Don’t get me wrong, I indulged in the occasional cookie or pizza, but I was good at guilting my self into heath food to make healthy milk;)

      Duration and work?
      I worked with my first baby. I breast fed for 8 weeks and found that the stress of going back to work for me dramatically impacted my milk. Thank god I pumped and froze enough milk, in my maternity leave, to carry her out a few extra months. I taught high school and my schedule was determined by the class bell and I really had no where private to go pump.. so by the third week of school, My milk was gone.
      There is home though!! My best friend is a nurse and she was able to breast feed longer. She had a supportive team at work and was able to regularly schedule time to pump. Keeping your pumping schedule as close to your little leaves nursing schedule is key.
      Work and family makes fitting in fitness harder, so don’t push yourself too hard too loose fast. My first time post baby took 2 years, I just wasn’t able to be as active and meet the family and work needs. But for me the key for success was doing what I could when I could and celebrating that every 1Lb down was a a pound closer to my goal and WAY better then up right!?
      I have tons of tips and trick for fitting in short effective fitness and controlling appetite… let me know if you are interested and I will post about them.

      Second baby has been easier for me, though she was collicie and we drove across country when she was four weeks old, I am able to stay home with her…. this helped me to feed her longer and fit in more work out time, thus 10 months to blow past my goal vs 2 years.
      I will add, working out with her also impacted my milk supply (you have to drink toooons of water if you want to breast feed and work out!!!)
      I can share info on breast feeding and working out if you are interested?

      I hope this help! I am always here for support and 100% understanding and judgment free, I have been there!

      Have a good day momma and let me know how I can helps support you!

  2. Pingback: She actually said,” you are too fat for that face ” | Homeostasis } Finding Joy Amongst the Chaos

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